Ho ho ho!
Santa's gettin' ripped and he's lost some weight
He's on a low-carb diet and he's lookin' great
He's got a sack full of rubbers and you better believe
The ladies will be screaming on Christmas Eve!
He delievers the sexy and he never fails
The rest of the year he works at Chip and Dales!

Sexy sexy santa
He's got a bitchin' sled and some rock-hard abs
Sexy sexy santa
He knows you've naughty cuz he's keepin' tabs!

In the back of his sleigh he's got some hoe hoe hoe's
They're lickin' eggnog drippin' from his firehouse
He traded little Prancer for an exotic dancer
Yeah you can see his North Pole if you look at his pants-a!
He's got a bitchin' red suit and he's totally buff
He'll come to your house if you got a stocking to stuff!

Sexy sexy santa
He's kissin' girls under the camel toe
Sexy sexy santa
The elves are all horny and they're snortin' blow
Sexy sexy santa
It's the UK USA Brazil and Japan
Sexy sexy santa
Makin' love to every Chirstmas-lovin' woman and man!
Suck it!

Yeah he's spreadin' Christmas cheer
To the Scrooges and the Grinches
Here's your log- it's a chubby eleven inches!

Naked on his reindeer [something] on booze
Makin' love to Christians and renegade Jews!
He's got a calander but only one day has an 'X'
That leaves 364 days for sex!

Sexy sexy santa
More cusion for the pushin' gonna [something]
Sexy sexy santa
He's hot but he used to be a big fat cow!
Sexy sexy santa
All the little girls wanna sit on his lap
Sexy sexy santa
Get 'em riled up so they get free crap (crabs?)

Wow! Little girl you wanna get a little Christmas inside of you tonight?