(distorted repeated background theme: "Barukh Atah Adonai Eloheinu Melekh ha-Olam")

(spoken)
That's the holiday...
that's the Hanukkah robot funk
(ba-rum-pa-pum-pum uh.)
Right about now...
gonna drop some Hanukkah science
yeah, hmm, uh--this is it...

I press a button make the gentleman cry
I rock a beat to make the hamburger fry
I funk this joint and check out holiday gear
The system booming strictly Pioneer
under the rear
bringing a tear
I turn it out in a holiday mode
safe like a seatbelt in a Volvo
keeping it real like a spray-snow tree
we'll shut it down harmoniously
rockin' softly
808 beats

(rap) I get this shit lit like a menorah
funk so illegal I think I might need a lawyer
not a firestarter but my beats get hotter
even amount like an allowance (??)
footwear riot (??) New Balance
hanukkah pimp on a check
like a micro rock(??) gettin' in a sweat (??)
Neal's mackin' track
ejaculatin' on buffet tables and record labels
willin' and able
bring my funk in place of each beat (???)
lifestyles of the slick and sleazy
spin around and around like a dreidel
kind of science that puts you back in the cradle
shit, sometimes this track's so poignant
somebody please pass me some kind of ointment
put these rhymes together like a thief
clear up your nose like a eucalyptus leaf
dropping science, you don't even know what hits you
next thing you know you're 13 and get a bar mitzvah

(background: "His Eminence is gay.")

I get down, I get down, I get down all the way
yeah yeah yeah yeah ooohhhhhh
I get down, I get down, I get down all the way, etc.

Hanukkah pimp [x20]
Pimpin'!!!!

(assorted noises, "menorah, menorah, menorah.......and my book (??)")